‘My son is 5 years old,he has a habit of throwing a tantrum whenever he wants something.He starts screaming and shouting if we refuse to give him something. Due this my husband and I have to face many embarrassments in public place. How do we change his behavior?’
Meltdowns are terrible, nasty things, but they’re a fact of childhood. Young kids, namely those between the ages of 1 and 5, haven’t developed good coping skills yet. They tend to just lose it instead.” And what, exactly, sets them off to begin with? Every single tantrum, results from one simple thing: not getting what they want. For children between 1 and 2, tantrums often stem from trying to communicate a need—more milk, a diaper change, that toy over there—but not having the language skills to do it. They get frustrated when you don’t respond to what they’re ‘saying’ and throw a fit. For older toddlers, tantrums are more of a power struggle. By the time kids are 3 or 4, they have grown more autonomous. They’re keenly aware of their needs and desires—and want to assert them more.
Here are tips to handle/control your child’s tantrums
- The louder they yell, the softer you speak– Your child will end up matching your volume because, ultimately, he/she wants to engage with you.
- Tune in to your child’s feelings– If you’re aware of your child’s feelings, you might be able to sense when big feelings are on the way. You can talk about what’s going on and help your child manage difficult feelings. You might also be able to distract your child.
- Identify tantrum triggers– For ex ample, your child might have tantrums when you’re shopping. You might be able to plan ahead or change the environment avoid tantrums. For example, it might help to go shopping after your child has had a nap and a snack.
- Stay calm– If you get angry, it’ll make the situation harder for both you and your child. If you need to speak at all, keep your voice calm and level, and act deliberately and slowly.
- Take charge when you need to– If the tantrum happens because your child wants something, don’t give her what she wants. If your child doesn’t want to do something, use your judgment.
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